What Online Dating and Personality Tests Mean for an Introvert

Recently I decided to try my hand at an online dating site, not cause I NEED help with dating, but because I need help with dating.

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How to Guide: Caring for an Introvert

If I could give someone a guide on how to work with me, these twelve rules would live in it boldly.  I recently saw this poster on Facebook and thought, WOW; whoever wrote this must really know me.  Everything I am, what I believe, how I feel and react, and what I do originates from these twelve rules on caring for introverts.  Yet, before reading this list, I couldn’t understand why I felt the way I did about crowds, sudden and seemingly unnecessary change, keeping people at a distance (especially new people), small talk, long conversations, talking to strangers out of the blue, and a high sensitivity to PDA (public displays of anything ).

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Social Skills: What I Wish School Taught Me

A social studies classroom.

Image via Wikipedia

One could look at me and wonder, if you’re truly that introverted, how could you ever be married or have dated for that matter?  Well the answer to that is I’m still human and intimate relationships is a part of everyone’s life, whether you have to buy dolls, toys, or go for the real thing (I just chose going, or waiting for the real thing).  But here’s something about me most people who know me don’t realize: in the past, if it were left up to me, I would never have experienced intimate relationships with the opposite sex. I wouldn’t have even had friendships for that matter.  My thoughts were, if a guy wants me he’ll make a way to come get me and friendships always sort of fell into place.  But here’s where the shock of my life came; for reasons I still cannot understand, all the above changed when I saw my husband.  For the first time in my life I saw something I wanted and I went after it (which is why he tells everyone I stalked him, so not true).  The funny thing is, for the first time in my life I had it bad for something and I prepared to position myself for as long at it took to make a way for him and I meet (That sound like stalking? Maybe).  I have no idea why I felt that way, but I did.  When I initiated our conversation, I wasn’t scared, not even nervous.  For the first time in my socially awkward life, I made a decision to risk social embarrassment and rejection.  But enough about my so-called love life, let’s get to the real reason for this post.  Why a quiet person like myself initially decided to leave my social future up to chance opposed to acquired knowledge of social skills and proper socialization.

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Blog Topics: How to go from very shy to less shy

I first want to thank Chris Brogan for the topic of this blog post.  He gave bloggers 100 topics he feels bloggers neglect so I’m attempting to offer my expertise on one of the subjects I so dearly relate to, shyness.  Hope this helps.

Cover of "Little Miss Shy"

Cover of Little Miss Shy

Looking back on my life I have always been shy. Science will tell you nurture and not nature attributes to many of the traits people exhibit, but as I grew to understand and know more about my mother and father, I realize much of the way I am came from the way they were.  Most of the way I behave comes from my mother though.  But I refuse to go on about why myself or other people end up being shy.  This blog is about how I’m overcoming major shyness to become the kind of person I have always admired, those darn extroverts.
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